New Moon: Revisited
by Opalaisha
Summary: This is my take on what it would be like if the incident of Bella jumping off the cliff was avoided. If I get over ten reviews, positive or negative, I will write another chapter. Please read and review.


_Twilight_

_Bella and Jacob for Once_

_This is my take on how it would be if Jacob and Bella ended up together. Now, I fully expect all of you "Canon Readers" flames, so show no mercy. Please? Besides, everyone must've known this was coming - I've already seen them on Fanfiction and I want to give it a try. Okay, so, this is going to begin on the scene in __**New Moon**__ where Bella is first going to Billy's house on the day that she was going to go cliff diving with Jacob; and so we begin...._

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Didn't I promise to take you cliff diving?"

I shivered.

"Yeah, it will be pretty cold--not as cold as it is today. Can you feel the weather changing? The pressure? It will be warmer tomorrow. You up for it?"

The dark water did not look inviting, and, from this angle, the cliffs looked even higher than before. But it had been days since I heard Edward's voice. That was probably part of the problem. I was addicted to the sounds of my dellusions. It made things worse if I went too long without them. Jumping off a cliff was certain to remedy that situation.

"Sure. I'm up for it. Fun"

"Its a date," he said, and draped his arm around my shoulders.

"Okay--now, let's go get you some sleep." I didn't like the way the circles under his eyes were beginning to look permanently etched into his skin.

I woke early the next morning and snuck a change of clothes out to the truck. I had a feeling that Charlie would approve of today's plan just about as much as he would approve of the motorcycle.

The idea of a distraction from all my worries almost had me excited. Maybe it _would_ be fun. A date with Jacod, a date with Edward. . . . I laughed darkly to myself. Jake could say what he wanted about us being a messed-up pair--I was the one who was truly messed up. I made the werewolf seem downright normal.

I expected Jacob to meet me out at the front, the way he usually did when my noisy truck announced my arrival. When he didn't, I guessed that he must still be sleeping. I would wait--let him get as much rest as he could. He needed his sleep, and that would give the day time to warm a bit more. Jake had been right about the weather, though; it had changed in the night. A thick layer of clouds pressed heavily on the atmosphere now, making it almost sultry; it was warm and close under the gray blanket. I left my sweater in the truck.

I knocked quietly on the door.

"C'mon in, Bella," Billy said.

He was at the kitchen table, eating cold cereal.

"Jake sleeping?"

"Err, no...." he set his spoon down, and his eyebrows pulled together.

"What happened?" I demanded. I could tell from his expression that _something_ was bad.

"Embry, Jared, and Paul crossed a fresh trail early this morning. Sam and Jake took off to help. Sam was hopeful--she's hedged herself in beside the mountains. He thinks they have a good chance to finish this."

"Oh no, Billy," I whispered. "Oh no."

He chuckled deep and low. "Do you really like La Push so well that you want to extend your sentence here?"

"Don't make jokes, Billy. This is too scary for that."

"You're right," he agreed, still complacent. His ancient eyes were impossible to read. "This one's tricky."

I bit my lip.

"It's not as dangerous for them as you think it is. Sam knows what he's doing. You're the one that you should worry about. The vampire doesn't want to fight them. She's just trying to find a way around them . . . . to you."

"How does Sam know what he's doing?" I demanded, brushing aside his concerns for me. "They've only killed just the one vampire--that could have been just luck."

"We take what we do very seriously, Bella. Nothing's been forgotten. Everything they need to know has been passed down from father to son for generations."

That didn't comfort me the way he probably intended it to. The memory of Victoria, wild, catlike, lethal, was too strong in my head. If she couldn't get around the wolves, she _would_ eventually go through them.

**( Ok kids, this is where I go off on my own for the rest )**

"Billy, what does Jacob _do_ all the time when I'm not around?"

_What on earth am I __**doing**__? _I asked myself. Why should I care about what Jacob does in his spare of time? I hoped that I wasn't turning possessive of my werewolf best friend. What would that accomplish? Nothing.

"Err, he usually sits around and talks with Embry. Why do you ask?" Billy asked, not turning back to me.

"Just curious," I replied a little too quickly for casual conversation. I quickly turned away and plopped down on the couch--reaching for the remote. I started flipping through the limited channels the Blacks house had to offer. I wasn't even watching the lights dancing across the screen as I just stared at the television, deep in thought.

_Why did I ask Billy that? It came out of nowhere...._ I didn't know what was going on, what was this feeling that was stirring within me? I haven't felt this kind of feeling since.... But I didn't want to think about him, or the _impossible_ fact that the feeling could be reproduced for another.

"I will be at the beach" I called to Billy, practically running for the exit. I couldn't let myself think too hardly about things like this--it never turns out well in the end.

I ran to my truck and started the engine. I didn't know exactly where I was going but I drove down the streets of La Push until, of course, I ended up down the 180 that led me down to the Quileute beachside. I rolled my eyes and climbed out of the cab when I was parked. I dragged myself through the thick brush of the forest surrounding the beach, and eventually made it out.

I was seriously beginning to dislike this beach. Day after day, I was condemned to walk up and down this beach for hours and hours on end, not being able to do anything-- swimming was definitely out of the question considering this was _Forks, Washington_ we were talking about and I didn't have a bathi.... _Wait!_

I immediately recalled the very reason why I came to La Push in the first place-- the edges around the hole in my heart pulsed as I recalled that I was supposed to be able to hear my dellusion of Edward's serene and beautiful voice. I looked up to the north and spotted the cliff where Jacob and I first saw the _La Push Gang_--I laughed at the though--jump off. I remembered Sam diving off and spiralling through the air, so free and uncaring. I wanted that feeling too. After all, I had promises to break.

Excited again, I ran back through the brush, not noticing the swirling clouds that honed over the ocean ahigh the clouds.

I made it to my truck once again, and started driving through the unmarked trail up to the level of the cliffs. I noticed there was only a trail to the top peak of the plateau. Was I that desperate for my dellusions that I would be able to do it? Yes, I immediately decided. I parked my car and climbed out.

While I was walking down the last of the grassy hill toward the rocks of the cliff, I finally noticed something. The sky was starting to turn a very purplish color, and it was beginning to rain very hard. This wouldn't stop me though.

But then something happened, an insight perhaps? I could see that if I did this now, what it would mean. I wouldn't be pure, selfless as Edward put it, if I did this. This Evel Knievel thing was fun, but.... cliff diving is so dangerous, and _Charlie_, what would it mean to him? What would happen to him if I landed on a sharp rock or what not and died? Was hearing Edward really worth that much?

Distracted by my reverie, I failed to notice that the high winds broke off a branch of a palm beach and it was hurdling towards me. I didn't notice in time, and found myself seeing the gray rocks off the cliffhead before everything went black....

I awoke completely dazed, and very.... warm. I faintly remembered the ice cold rain that was pouring down on me before.... I don't know. Should I not be freezing now?

I tried to move, but something restricted me. I then finally started listening, and I could hear voices. They were sad, _horribly sad_. I could hear the sound of a woman crying. . . and crying hard. Oh god! Was that Renee?! Had I died?!

No, this couldn't be death. . . . it shouldn't be painful like this. I could feel a swelling pain in the back of my head. What was going on? I needed answers, so I struggled harder against my binds, until I heard a voice.

"Bella, honey! Are you awake?" Jacob said to me. He sounded _frantic_.

"Jacob? W-where am I?" I asked.

"Yes. Yes, Bells. I'm here. Your at my place. We found you.... unconscious near the cliffs.. What were you thinking, Bella? Were you going to jump alone?" he demanded, angry. Was I injured?

I sat up, and this time he didn't stop me. I found out the "restrictions" were his _arms_. Were were on _his_ bed, and he was holding me. This.... didn't upset me as much as I was counting on. This annoyed me.

I looked around his tiny bedroom--at the shelfs that extended above his bed, to small rectangular windows, until I heard the crying again. It was a voice I recognized. It was Sue Clearwater's voice, from when Charlie and I stayed over for a party at the Blacks' house.

"Jake, what's going on? Why is Sue crying?"

He sat up too, and stared at the ground. I thought that I saw a tear escape his eye, but my eyes were too exhausted to be completely dependable. _What was going on?!_

"Jake, come on-"

"....Harry is at the hospital. He had a heart attack, and they rushed him out there. Its.... not looking good"

I gasped. How close had I come to creating another problem? I was about to _jump off a cliff_ for crying out loud!

"Why is she still here? Doesn't she feel like she has to go to the hospital?" I asked, feeling a bit of annoyed that she could _sit here and cry, doing nothing_ while her husband is in danger of laying there alone in a cot and dying all by himself.

"They're leaving now" I said matter-of-factly, as I heard tires on the wet pavement.

"Oh," was all I could say.

I felt the bed struggle to hold the extra weight as Jake adjusted himself so that his head was next to me, laying on top of his arms. I chuckled, as I look behind me to see that his legs were forced to bend to do this. But, the humor died right away as I took in his expression. It was _pained_. Harry Clearwater was one of Billy's bestfriends, so he must've gotten close to him as well--also Leah and Seth Clearwater were his friends, so he could be worried about them. _What should I do? _I could try and comfort him, but what if it backfires?

I got so deep into my thoughts that I didn't notice that Jake grabbed my hand until he was rubbing it across his face. I felt a sting of pain as I felt moisture slide down my hand. I knew it was tears. . . .

"Oh Jake, it will be okay. Don't feel negative about this. Harry will pull through. I promise."

I tried to pull my hand back, but he held fast. "Its not him. . .Bella, I almost lost you today. If you would've jumped off that cliff. . ._Who knows what would have happened? _Those reeking bloodsuckers returning wouldn't be as bad as finding you dead, floating lifelessly out there in the ocean...."

If there was a time I felt great pain.... this was worse. The second this sentence left his mouth, tears began to cascade down my werewolf best friend's cheeks. I once said that when he felt pain, I felt pain. This moment in time proved my theory. He was scared, no terrified that he could have lost me. How much had I almost hurt him?

"Jacob, I'm sorry," I whispered. I felt wretched about this whole Evel Knievel thing. I could've hurt Jacob, Renee, Charlie…. Oh god, I feel like crying too. Now Harry was dying in the hospital and I almost added another death to the day. _What is wrong with me?! No wonder he left me…._

This thought should've made the edges of the hole in my heart murder me, but….they didn't burn. I didn't feel anything! What was going on with me lately?

He replied by kissing the inside of my wrist, keeping clear of the bite mark from James's venomous teeth. I faintly wondered why.

Normally, this was crossing the lines that I had placed between Jake and myself, but for some reason this gesture did not bother me the way it usually did. Then suddenly, an epiphany hit me….

Could I be _in love_ with Jacob? Jacob, the one person that I could trust with my secrets. _All_ of them now that he knew of my unrequited love with a family of vampires. He was my safe harbor, someone I could go to when I needed warmth and comfort. But, this love I felt for him did not compare with what I felt for- cringe -Edward.

However, there was _something_ there. I remembered when he avoided me at the behest of Sam, the pack leader-while we were avoiding each other, I thought to myself that what Jake and I had was more than a "schoolyard romance". It was stronger, so why was I so down on him? This was someone who was almost human like me; someone who I could actually have a life with, without the risk of being killed by a loving gesture.

I was broken out of my reverie when a flash of light came in through Jake's small windows, and the sound of wheels on pavement again. I heard Jake start breathing hard, and I got what was bothering him. Harry must've….

_"…yes, Sam. Go to Sue, she needs someone…"_

I heard Jake gasp and hang his head in mourning as Billy confirmed that Harry had passed away tonight. Jake and I both got up from the bed and stepped out into the hallway. It was darker than I thought it was.

"Dad, is he?"

Billy's head hung down, and he pushed his chair through the kitchen into his bedroom.

I looked to Jake to see his fists clenched and his face was heartbreaking….

I surprised myself ,and apparently him as well, as I wrapped my arms around his waist and snuggled into his warm chest to comfort him. He didn't wrap his arms around me but it didn't bother me. This wasn't a romantic gesture. It was to show Jake that I was here if he needed someone to vent on, and I wasn't leaving. Not until I knew he would be alright.

Jake was, as always, on the same page as me.

"Why don't I get you home? You should probably be there when Charlie decides to head that way."

I nodded and Jake stepped outside. Where was Charlie? At the hospital? I would've asked, but it seemed irrelevant at the moment. I was much too far into the thought of how I could comfort Jacob. My personal sun had imploded once before, and I _couldn't_ let it happen again! Not if I wanted to continue to be free of the emptiness that always threatened to consume me. But what could I do?

I stepped outside just in time to be blinded by the headlights of my Chevy. This actually helped my mind come to a solution….one that I don't think I could do.

The one fail-safe solution to Jake's sudden depression would be to tell him that I feel the same for him as he does for me. Could I betray my feelings like that? Worse, what if he found out about my fraud?

_Wait, hold on one second!_ Was it fraud? Back in another lifetime, I came to the Quileute beach with Mike and friends for a surfing outing; I got Jacob alone and ineptly flirted answers from him. I remembered that I didn't try and fake my interest in him, it was entirely natural. Like breathing. He then asked Mike if I was his girlfriend--of course I denied it—and I immediately said no and _winked_ at him. I had a faint idea of what vampires did on a daily basis around humans, made them flounder.

Jake opened the passenger door for me, his spiky hair matted to his forehead, frowning. I got in without complaint. I didn't feel like driving right now. I hoped he could.

Jake got in and the truck rumbled as we began our drive back to Forks. The ride was not uncomfortable. Jake was apparently himself enough to put his long muscular arm around me, and I didn't object. It was cold.

I was in a daze for the entire trip. Could I have fallen asleep?

When I blinked, it seemed like we were just leaving the last houses of the reservation. When my eyes opened, I we were just stopping in front of my house.

I didn't want to leave him. What if he falls into another crying jag? I couldn't function if I couldn't know that he was doing okay. But he was waiting for me to get out apparently, because he was drawing his arm back.

It was confirmed that this wasn't exactly the case when he started speaking again.

"Bells, I'm sorry. I know that you don't feel the same. But, I'm just so happy that your unharmed. You could've died if you jumped off that cliff, and I never would've saw you again. Bells….I…"

He was beginning to stutter, so I knew what was coming. _Oh god….I can't say it back…._

He was starting to shake. I felt the truck shaking too. It would've been awkwardly funny if he didn't look so heartbroken. So unsure of himself.

I felt like shooting myself in the foot at my next words.

"Tell me Jacob."

This must've given him courage, and that vaguely made me happy. "I'm in love with you Bella. I know nothing can come from it, but…. I want you to know this."

I already knew this, but something about the husky voice he used caused a reaction in my body. I scooted across the seat and wrapped my arms around him tightly. This time, he did the same. He was gasping about something….

_Oh crap…._ He must think that this hug means that I reciprocate his feelings. My first reflex reaction was to pull back, but what would that do? I was smart enough to know that rejecting him now would lead to serious consequences.

Was this love? Strong friendship? I didn't know, but the happiness that was radiating off of him was having a curious effect on me. It made me happy; and I wanted more of it. What else could I do?

My eyes widened slightly as the answer immediately dawned on me. My face was snuggled into his muscular chest. If I did this, I knew immediately what would follow. _No doubt_.

I was planning on kissing his chest. If he felt it, and I knew he would, he would tilt my head up and nervously kiss my lips. This would help him! I could go in without worry of him breaking down again.

_This is not romance, this is comforting!_ I screamed to my mind and heart as my lips pursed together and I planted a kiss on Jake's heart. Sure as day, he gasped and his big brown hand came to my chin and tilted my head so I could see the flabbergasted look on his face.

"Bella…." he gasped out as his face started to descend towards mine.

_Just close your eyes and it will be over before you know it!_ I told myself over and over. It seemed to be working as I closed my eyes. What I didn't expect was this.

When his lips came to mine, he turned forceful. His warm lips pushed mine open and I felt his warm breath escape into my mouth. This caused me to freeze in place, and it seemed to bother him. His hand came to the back of my head and he kissed rougher. I started to return it awkwardly.

To me, this seemed as an _overly_ friendly gesture, but he seemed to think differently. I wouldn't impose on his happiness. Let him think what he wants. But, his lips were _so warm and inviting_. I couldn't help but respond and caress his cheek as we massaged each other's lips.

At the need of breath, we both pulled away. The smile on his face was like a man seeing the sun for the first time! It was so gorgeous! The happiness radiating off of him was almost viewable. I was in heaven.

But that feeling, for me, started to fade as the inevitable feeling of betrayal dawned on me.

_Who am I betraying? Besides myself? Edward left me—he fell out of love with me._ I needed to accept this if I wanted to have a future. It was just so hard. Life offered me a happiness that I never would have expected, and took it away so abruptly—that even after six months, it still felt like the beginning, where he left me standing there in the forest around my house as my forehead yearned for his lips again as he gave it one last kiss.

The wind finally died down as we spent at least forty five minutes in the truck, thinking. It felt as though it held something that could have broken Jacob, and I was glad that it went away. What it was, I was curious to know of.

"Charlie is pulling up" Jacob said happily, but also sadly at the thought of leaving. The high of our kiss must be decreasing on his nerves as well.

_Or not…._ I thought as he crashed his lips on mine again. Too quickly, he had his door open and ran into the night—his frame quivering from the transformation he was about to receive.

Okay, enough happiness and confusion. I need to comfort Charlie now. I say as the police cruiser pulled into the driveway beside me….

Okay kids, I'm finished. I hope you guys enjoy reading this take, because I most definitely enjoyed writing it. I know there was a bit of plagiarism in the beginning, but that was just to get you into the story. Stephanie Meyer is an incredible writer and I am trying to be even half as good a writer as her.

Even if it is flames—readers _PLEASE_ review me. That is the purpose of publicly writing. To get positive and negative reactions out of its readers. So let me know your feelings about it.


End file.
